Day 10: The Bad Habit Hit List: A Countdown to Unf*cking Your Life, One Crappy Habit at a Time

#6. Compulsive Online Shopping: No, you don’t need that flamingo-shaped mug

Image created by Author using DALL-E

We need to talk.

Remember that time you told yourself you were “just browsing”?

You ended up £200 poorer with a trolley full of weird kitchen gadgets, novelty socks, and a Himalayan salt lamp that promised to “cleanse your aura” (it didn’t).

---

The late-night scroll of doom

It always starts the same way.

You’re lying in bed, phone in hand, aimlessly scrolling—then BAM!

Some algorithm-powered, hyper-targeted ad slaps you in the face with an item you didn’t even know existed but now desperately must have it.

A heated butter knife?
Genius.

A banana-shaped cat bed?
Essential.

A tiny vacuum for your keyboard?
HOW HAVE YOU SURVIVED THIS LONG WITHOUT IT?

Next thing you know, you’re entering your card details like a hypnotised cult member, fully convinced that this is the thing that will finally complete your life. (It won’t.)

---

Why are we like this?

Well, for one, capitalism is a sneaky bastard.

But beyond that, there’s some serious psychology at play:

• Dopamine Rush –
  Clicking “Buy Now” gives you a hit of feel-good chemicals, making you believe your life is improving. (it’s not, but the packaging is cute.)

• Fear of Missing Out (FOMO) –
  That “Only 2 Left in Stock!” warning is emotional blackmail, and we fall for it every time.

• Retail Therapy –
  Feeling stressed, sad, or bored? Just buy something! (Even though it won’t fix anything, but hey, you’ll look fabulous sobbing into your brand-new weighted blanket.)

• The Illusion of Productivity –
  Buying a planner doesn’t make you organised, and purchasing a treadmill doesn’t mean you’re suddenly an athlete.
  But damn, it feels like progress.

  ---

The post-purchase regret spiral

Ah yes, the inevitable crash.

Your parcel arrives, you tear it open with the enthusiasm of an over-eating kid on Christmas morning… and within five minutes, the magic is gone.

The flamingo mug is cute, sure, but is it £17.99 worth of cute?

Did you really need a fifth one?

And why does your bank statement look like a crime scene?

---

How to break the cycle (or at least slow it down)

Look, I’m not here to tell you to stop shopping entirely—I’m not a monster.

But if you’re tired of drowning in random clutter and regretting your choices, here are a few ways to rein it in:

• The 48-Hour Rule –
  Want something?
  Wait two days before buying it.
  If you still desperately need it after 48 hours, go for it. (You’ll forget about it.)

• Unsubscribe from Temptation –
  Unfollow the brands, opt out of the promo emails, and stop letting Instagram ads whisper sweet nothings in your ear.

• Set a ‘Fun Money’ Budget –
  Give yourself a set amount for silly purchases each month.
  That way, when you buy something ridiculous, at least it’s planned ridiculousness.

• Ask Yourself: ‘Do I Need This, or Am I Just Bored?’ –
  If the answer is “bored,” step away from the checkout page and go touch some grass. (I said grass, not ass, you animal!).

  ---

Final thought: The flamingo mug can wait

At the end of the day, there’s nothing wrong with treating yourself.

But if your bank account is crying, and your home is slowly turning into a warehouse of useless trinkets, maybe—just maybe—it’s time to take a step back.

Besides, let’s be honest.

That flamingo-shaped mug?

You’d probably use it twice before it gets shoved to the back of the cupboard next to that popcorn maker, and the pancake maker, you swore you’d use every weekend.

---

Next up in The Bad Habit Hit List:

#5. Perfectionism: If it’s not perfect, burn it… or maybe just don’t even bother in the first place!

Hang on, that sentence wasn’t perfect, was it? Uh… so… uh… just read the next article!