Day 4: The Bad Habit Hit List: A Countdown to Unf*cking Your Life, One Crappy Habit at a Time
#12 Staying Up Too Late: Just One More Episode… Said the Lying Bastard
We all know this game.
The clock hits a respectable bedtime, your brain casually suggests, “Hey, maybe we should sleep.”
And like the absolute menace that you are, you reply, “Yeah, yeah, just one more…”
And that’s it.
That’s the moment you doomed yourself.
Just one more episode…
Just one more article…
Just one more self-help video because I clearly haven’t absorbed the last 500 and I’m still an unhinged weirdo…
Next thing you know, it’s 3:42 AM, your eyeballs are dryer than a Nun’s purse in the Sahara, and you’re calculating if two hours of sleep is enough to function.
Netflix is the villain (but so is my brain)
Look, I’d love to blame Netflix.
Or YouTube.
Or that one random Wikipedia rabbit hole that started with “how do astronauts pee?” and ended with “the socio-economic impact of medieval cheese production.”
But the truth is, my brain is a relentless bastard that thrives on “just one more.”
And the worst part?
The lies I tell myself.
“I’ll just read one more sentence.” (Sure, because stopping mid-paragraph is a thing I do?)
“I’ll just watch for 10 more minutes.” (A bold claim when the next episode auto-plays in five.)
“This is the last video.” (We both know there’s a 12-part series and I’m already emotionally invested.)
The delusion of productivity
Oh, but sometimes, I’m not even procrastinating.
No, I tell myself I’m learning.
That somehow, at 1:57 AM, this next article will change my life.
That this next TED Talk will unlock a hidden part of my brain and suddenly, I’ll be an optimised, self-actualised genius who wakes up at 5 AM to meditate and drink green smoothies.
That’s never happened.
What has happened is me, barely conscious, zombie-shuffling to the kitchen, making an unholy caffeine sacrifice, and pretending I didn’t do this to myself.
How do we stop? (Do we even want to?)
I could give you the usual advice:
Set a bedtime. (Ha!)
Limit screen time. (Double ha!)
Establish a night routine. (My night routine is “pretend I’ll go to bed early” followed by “watching chaos unfold in real-time.”)
But here’s the real trick: Recognise the lie before you tell it.
When you whisper, “just one more”, call yourself out.
Loudly.
Out loud, even.
“You’re lying, you absolute, sleep-deprived Nazi.”
“You said this last time, and look what happened.”
“Your future self already hates you. Close the damn laptop.”
If that doesn’t work, well… enjoy your existential dread at 3 AM. I’ll be there too.
Now, tell me—what’s YOUR “just one more” excuse?
Call yourself out in the comments!
Tomorrow’s topic? Oh, you’ll love it. It’s all about—oh wait, hold that thought—sorry, no you go ahead—actually, you go first—wait, what was I saying again?