How 10 Years of Failing at Manifestation Led Me to a Breakthrough: The Secret I Finally Cracked
From desperation to unexpected wins — how shifting my mindset brought real results, including a Tax refund and a raise.
How 10 years of manifestation failures turned into success (eventually)
I spent a solid decade bashing my head against the manifestation wall.
I read every book, watched every YouTube video, and gobbled up every podcast like they were the last doughnuts at an office meeting.
Dr. Joe Dispenza, Napoleon Hill, Jay Shetty — you name it, I’ve consumed it.
But for the longest time, my efforts led me to nothing but frustration, empty bank accounts, and enough desperation to make a telemarketer look shy.
The problem: Trying too hard, feeling too desperate
You see, I thought manifesting was all about demanding things from the universe like a toddler who’s been told they can’t have a third ice cream.
And, boy, was I needy.
I was constantly begging the universe like, “Please, just give me a break!”
The problem?
I was demanding things for all the wrong reasons — ego-driven, insecure reasons.
It was like I’d shown up to the universe’s doorstep with my hat in hand, eyes wide, and my voice shaking, in true “Oliver!” style, begging:
“Please sir, may I have some more?”
And the universe?
“M-o-o-O-O-RE!!!???”
It couldn’t even be bothered to peek through the curtains.
What I did wrong (so you don’t have to): Reading, watching, and learning but never changing
I’d consumed content like it was my job — listened to Breaking the Habit of Being Yourself so many times I could recite it in my sleep, and practically took notes from What The Bleep Do We Know like I was cramming for a philosophy exam.
Yet, despite all my “research,” I still didn’t get it.
I thought I was doing everything right, but I was missing the one thing that would actually change the game: the feeling.
I wasn’t “feeling” like I already had what I wanted — I was constantly vibing like I needed it.
And neediness is like anti-magic to the universe.
It’s a repellent.
It’s the energy equivalent of garlic to a vampire.
If you’re desperate, all you’re going to attract is more situations to feel desperate about.
It’s like trying to charm a cat into sitting on your lap by staring at it — doesn’t work, mate.
![How You’re Sabotaging Your Life (And You Don’t Even Know It): Stop Steering Your Life Into Icebergs](https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_140,h_140,c_fill,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep,g_auto/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F15a0d2c1-d4f4-4e34-978e-6fd30a9fff0b_800x800.png)
How You’re Sabotaging Your Life (And You Don’t Even Know It): Stop Steering Your Life Into Icebergs
The shift: From scarcity to abundance (and the weird stuff that happened next)
So, what changed?
I’ll tell you.
It wasn’t some secret mantra, or a vision board plastered with Lamborghinis.
It was a shift in mindset.
I started to “feel” like I already had what I wanted.
Even though my bank account was giving me a death glare, I acted like the money was already there.
Like I was the kind of person who had enough.
Don’t get me wrong — this isn’t about spending money you don’t have
And as soon as I made that switch, things started to happen.
Here’s an example:
My wife got a cheque in the mail — a tax refund!
Now, this might sound like a regular Tuesday for some folks, but for us?
It was like a unicorn showing up with a pot of gold.
Until then, all we’d ever gotten from the tax man was demands for payment and those lovely little letters reminding us we owed more than we had.
Suddenly, it was the tax man paying us back?
That’s when I started thinking, “Alright, maybe this stuff actually works!”
The £30 donation that changed my perspective (and my salary)
Last Christmas, I did something that felt completely counterintuitive.
I’d never done it before.
I donated £30 to the Salvation Army.
Now, £30 might not sound like much, but when you’re feeling the financial squeeze, especially at Christmas time, it’s a small fortune.
I wasn’t exactly swimming in cash — more like paddling along with loose change in my pocket — but I thought, “If I can’t give a little to people who’ve got it worse than I do, then why the hell do I deserve to have more?”
And here’s the crazy thing— right after that, things started shifting.
I’m talking freakishly fast.
Like, within a week, I got called into a meeting with my boss. (Scary!)
Now, at this point, my self-confidence was about as sturdy as a house of cards in a wind tunnel, so naturally, I thought it was going to be a “we need to talk about your performance” kind of meeting.
The first few words that came out of my boss’s mouth made my heart plummet faster than a bungee jumper without a cord:
“I’ve noticed that when you’re not here…”
<GULP>
I braced for impact.
Sweaty bum, dry mouth — the whole “I’m fucked!” mindset.
But then, she followed it up with this:
“…the whole place seems to fall apart!”
Wait, what?
The unexpected honorarium (and how it proved the Law of Intention)
I was offered an honorarium.
I didn’t even know what an honorarium was at the time — I thought it was some sort of honorary punishment.
But no, my boss actually wanted to pay me extra for being, apparently, indispensable.
She even wanted me to train the rest of the team because, according to her, “You’re a really good teacher.”
I walked out of that meeting like I’d just won the lottery.
But here’s the thing — none of this happened until I stopped demanding from the universe and started feeling like I was already abundant.
And being generous…
And not necessarily in money, but in spirit - in attitude.
I finally understood the difference between the Law of Attraction and the Law of Intention.
Law of Attraction?
It’s just you putting out a signal — like setting up a dating profile and hoping someone swipes right.
A negative signal gets a negative attraction.
A positive signal gets a positive attraction.
But it’s no better than wishing — wishing for a positive, rather than going out there and actively being positive.
It’s like being terrible in your attitude and actions all day long, treating people like shit, then getting home and expecting good things to happen to you, just because you wished for it.
Not gonna happen!
Although your “wish” is for good, positive, things, your actions and your attitude are negative and that is what you attract back to you.
Law of Intention?
That’s like showing up to the date already convinced that they’re going to fall in love with you.
You act like it’s already done, and suddenly, the universe rolls out the red carpet.
You’re out there in the world, being kind in your attitude and actions all day long, treating people with kindness and love, and just being happy because you helped people today.
The universe is like:
“Yeah, man — I feel you! I see you there, doing good things — here’s some good shit to reward you for being good!”
You’ll find that you don’t even need to “wish” anymore, because good things seem to just keep happening to you.
Whoa, now hold your horses, Grandma — don’t get your knickers in a twist…
“Acting as if” isn’t about spending money you don’t have — that’s just plain dumb as fuck!
Don’t be out there racking up credit card debt because you think the universe is gonna swoop in like a fairy godmother and save you.
It’s about feeling like you already have it.
Feeling abundant.
Being a good person, not just dreaming about being one.
It’s not about going to the fanciest restaurant in town; it’s about ordering your cup of instant coffee like it’s a damn latte.
It’s about being grateful for the old, beat-up car you’re driving because, to you, or someone who doesn’t have a car at all, it’s already a Bentley.
And that shift in feeling and being changes the way the universe sees you.
You don’t have those things right now?
That’s cool.
But the weirdest thing is, as soon as you start feeling like you do and being that person — and I mean really feeling and being, not some airy-fairy bullshit — you’ll be shocked at how quickly things start to change.
Why the Law of Intention works (when the Law of Attraction fails)
Look, you can visualise your dream life all you want, but if you’re doing it from a place of lack, it’s like shouting into a black hole.
If you’re telling yourself “I’m a rich, confident person.”, but deep-down your subconscious is shouting “No, you’re a poor, anxious, fucker!”, then it’ll never happen.
The universe just shrugs and says, “Cool story, bro.”
But when you align your feelings with what you want, when you start believing you’re worthy of that new job, that extra cash, that unexpected tax refund — things shift.
I’m not saying you should go blow your rent money on lottery tickets, expecting the universe to cover you.
But the moment I shifted my focus from “I need this to survive” to “I’m already okay, and more would be nice,” things started happening.
It’s like I gave the universe a reason to pay attention.
Final takeaway: Feel worthy before you get the payoff
It’s funny how the universe works.
It’s not about saying the right words or thinking the right thoughts — it’s about feeling like you already deserve the things you want.
Being a good person, not just dreaming of it.
The moment you stop treating the universe like a cosmic vending machine and start acting like it’s a business partner, everything changes.
So, here’s my advice: Don’t just ask the universe for stuff.
Ask yourself why you deserve it.
Give a little even when it feels like you shouldn’t.
Act like you’re already the person who’s got it all together.
Because when you do, the universe starts to believe it too.
Subscribe for more straight-talk
If you’re tired of fluffy manifesting tips that don’t work and want real stories about what actually does, subscribe to the (UN)BROKEN.
Trust me, you don’t want to be the one missing out when your friends start applying this stuff and see results.